Saturday, January 4, 2014

Facebook

I'm letting go of a number of habits and other things that feel like mental and physical clutter.  Some are temporary, others I'm hoping to let go of for good.

Facebook is, I think, one of the temporary ones.  I find myself checking it whenever I'm at the computer, sometimes without even having consciously intended to check it.  Like a muscle twitch.  I don't like that.  And when I was feeling particularly icky, the other night, I went there intentionally, hoping to feel cheerfully social, hoping for a little distraction from my earache and sore throat, and instead wound up feeling stressed and as if people were shouting at me (and I wasn't even in the midst of any conflict-ridden conversations, it was just something about the layout of the site and the headlines that happened to be going around).  And then of course there's been a lot of stress floating around about colds and flus, and I didn't want that floating around my head when I wasn't feeling well.

The effort it takes to remember not to check FB every minute and a half is starting to make me twitchy.

In recent conversations, several friends have mentioned things they do instead of head to FB, when they're feeling social -- sitting down to write personal letters to friends, calling family members, getting out of the house to somewhere like the library or a local cafe (somewhere they're likely to run into someone they know).  I like the idea of riding out the twitchiness and instead making a point of carving out little bits of time for one on one connection, instead of shouting out into the marketplace, hoping to be heard.

So far the experiment's only an hour or so old, and the main thing I've noticed is how much I miss candy crush.  :/  Not that surprising -- I like to do crossword puzzles and logic puzzles and play solitaire while I'm doing other things, and candy crush served that sort of purpose perfectly.  I don't have any games on my chromebook (the only way to get games on it, as I understand, is through google play, and I wasn't impressed with the ones I checked out).  I'd ask for recommendations for websites that might serve the same purpose, only...   facebook is, of course, where I generally go to get those sorts of recommendations.  :)

2 comments:

  1. Candy Crush was SO hard for me to let go of. But, when I did, when the moment was clearly *right*, after the first 24 hours or so, it fell away beautifully and with surprising finality. The place FB holds in my daily life has morphed and my relationship with it has shifted over the years. I think about taking breaks, but don't because there are friends there who I know I would lose contact with during my absence. The 1:1 in person time with friends is something I cultivate, but I can't do that with many of my FB friends. It's interesting...I have FB friends who have set up a group where complaining is not allowed...and another group just for venting. I think many feel the way that you do, that it's stressful to log on only to have so many "shouts" on their news feed. Enjoy your time off!

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    Replies
    1. Oh, how I hear you on the possibility of losing contact with some of your FB friends. I got email from FB last night that someone had tagged me, so I went over this morning to see if it was something I needed to respond to. It wasn't, but in the few moments I was there, I saw that one friend was "live FBing" her move, and another had posted this lovely story of his stroll through the city, and another is reaching out for support and I'd like to be one of the people supporting her... And FB is the only way I'll be part of those particular conversations, realistically. And I do *want* to be part of those conversations.

      I hope the break will give me a chance to figure out how to use FB in a way that maximizes its benefits and minimizes its drawbacks.

      I have a list, "safe people", who're folks I can post anything to, without feeling like I have to brace myself for possible responses. I noticed, the other day, that if I read the "safe people" list instead of my newsfeed, that cuts down on the shouting feeling. That might be something to explore, when I'm easing back in...

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